what would have been a deal-breaker

So, I’m going to this adoption forum at our old church on Friday night…, I told Dan about a month into our relationship. Can I go with you?, he asked. Um, YES! 

We sat at a table with three couples from our new church, August Gate. We were probably the only unmarried couple there. And definitely the youngest. I felt a bit embarrassed/anxious/silly, but I was happy. I had been praying since long before I met Dan that I would someday marry a man who was willing to adopt. And since I had started dating Dan, I had prayed that with God’s perfect timing, we would have an opportunity to talk about adoption.

Because, really, it was a deal-breaker for me if Dan wasn’t willing to adopt. And, really, it was a deal-breaker for me if he was just “kinda okay” with the idea. 

After the forum, we sat in a pavillon in a nearby park listening to the rain and watching the lightning. Would you be willing to adopt someday?,  I asked. Absolutely!, he said. In fact, I’ve never been attached to the idea of having biological children. I’ve always known I wanted kids… but just however God would choose to provide them. 

Sometimes, when I’m really happy, I can’t sleep. And I couldn’t sleep that night.

More soon on how my thoughts on fostering + adopting have changed since this having-a-husband thing became way more real.


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